Wednesday, February 16, 2011

You Choose

You know the saying, you can't choose your family, well have you ever asked yourself if you could, would you choose the one you have? I am not talking about your husband and children, I am talking about the ones that came before you. We have all been there. We have had those moments where you wonder how you could possibly share the same DNA as those people. Some people may even toy with the idea that maybe they were adopted or abducted at a young age and that somewhere out there is a perfect family just waiting to find them. Well, this may be a shocker, but that picture perfect family does not exist. You may as well embrace the insanity because it is that insanity that made you who you are today. You do have a choice to make now though. You can sit around repeating all of the bad decisions and mistakes that your ancestors made or you can say, I know I am better than this and I will prove it. I will prove that your future is not predetermined by others' pasts. Maybe you came from a long line of alcoholics, but you can choose whether or not to take that first drink. Maybe you don't know who your dad is because your mom changed men more often than she changed clothes. You can choose whether you make a long term commitment to the one right man or you can choose to continue the trend, sleeping with/marrying all the wrong men and procreating every now and again. Maybe your dad was an abusive prick who either used you as a punching bag or worse, was a little too fond of you, if you know what I mean. You can choose to get the therapy to help you overcome what was done to you and hopefully not pass on those traits, or you can become the image of your father, but hopefully, someone will stop that trend. I come from a very long line of opinionated, loud-mouthed, overbearing women (and I don't care if any of them are reading this because they know it is true). I guess I could choose to end that trait too, but honestly, there are many worse things in my family history that I fight to overcome, I figure you have to prioritize things and being loud and bossy is just not at the top of my list. I am far from perfect; my family is far from perfect; however, I refuse to use the past as a crutch or excuse for decisions and choices that I make as an adult, in the present.

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