Saturday, June 25, 2011

Guitar Man

So, confession time. I have always had a thing for artistic men. Whether it was actors, singers, writers, artists, or, God help me, guitar players. Unfortunately, my hubby is none of the above; bless his heart. He does appreciate it all, but just isn't that talented himself. For now, I want to talk about my attraction to musicians. I am focusing on this because I am spending hundreds of dollars for my son to take guitar lessons. He loves it and according to his instructor, he has a natural talent. As a parent, I am happy to foster his love and talent for music; however, as a woman, I often wonder "what the hell am I thinking!?!" I know exactly what happens to young girls the first time a boy picks up a guitar and plays for them. I remember how instantly his attractiveness increased if he was talented in the least. I can't tell you how many nights I sat and just listened to someone pick around on their guitar, God help me if they could sing too! Why would I want to turn my sweet little boy into that boy? All you women know that boy I am talking about. The crooner who could be a complete ass, but as long as he apologized with a sweet song, he was forgiven. The one who hung around long past his expiration date just because you can't stop seeing someone who cared enough to write you a song. You know why I do it? Because I am still a sucker for a boy with a guitar! I can sit and watch my son playing and see the smile on his face, and I know that he becomes a little less dorky when he plays. I know that there is always gonna be a girl who just can't resist the guitar player. I know that because of those girls, there are always going to be boys who want to be his friend. So, my desire to make my son's life a little easier outweighs the instinct that tells me not to make him that tortured musician that broke my heart so many times.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Father's Day

"A son is a son until he takes him a wife, but a daughter is a daughter, all of her life" While reading and hearing what people have done today on Father's Day, I have found that these words are very true for many. Don't get me wrong, I love my daddy. He was the person who showed me what a real husband and father was supposed to be like. He became the model for all men who entered my life to measure up to. I know lots of little girls feel the same way. However, the women I don't understand are the ones who can't seem to let go of being a daddy's girl once they have a husband. How can you expect your husband to feel important if you put him on a back burner for daddy? This is pretty important on Father's Day too. If you have made your husband a father, given him a bundle of joy or two, then you should remember that Father's Day is his day too. Don't get so wrapped up in being daddy's girl and forget your husband. Just think how you would feel if he focused more on his mother than you on Mother's Day. My two cents for the day!

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Searching

I have spent my life on a constant mission. Searching for something. Sometimes I know what I am searching for and sometimes I am just on a blind trek. Often, I am on a search for myself. Life is hard and complicated and somewhere along the journey, you lose pieces of yourself. You lose your security when you leave home for the first time, whether it is to be out on your own or to go to college. You lose a big piece of your heart to your first love and most are not with that love forever. As a woman, I lost my name the day I got married. I know you don't have to do that, but I did, so I lost that long trusted identifying part of me. Then you have children and as much as they are wanted and loved, you become a parent and there is no turning back. I lost the woman I was before Mama. Now I am losing my youth and exhuberance and there is no turning back. So, I am on a mission. A mission to find the woman I was once. The one that I loved being and miss so often. I may make mistakes along the way, but I am only human. So wish me luck on this long journey. I pray that one day I can announce that I have arrived.