Sunday, May 1, 2011

Love Me or Leave Me

So, I usually blog late at night. I think it has alot to do with the fact that I am usually up alone and the house is relatively quiet, so I have time to process everything that has been done or said during the day. So, if you have asked me something or told me something, rest assure that it is in these quiet times in the middle of the night that I take the time to mull it over. It isn't that I don't care about what you have said, I just normally don't have the time to think about it. This in no way means that I care about everything that is said. In actuality, I probably only care about maybe 25% and that may be a generous estimate. I have never been one to care what the masses think. Rocking the boat is often my specialty. Usually that is what people find the most endearing about me. However, if you don't like it, don't like me, then that is okay. I have more respect for those who dislike me and make that known than those who are fake and pretend to be a friend. You aren't fooling anyone, especially me. I don't let people get close. You may think that I have shared my deepest, darkest secrets with you, but the fact is, I am a pretty open person and there are lots of deeper, darker things that you will never know. Gernerally, people don't think I am a nice person, because most of the time I'm not. I am not the person to call when you want to hear the flowery, compassionate answer. You call me when you want to hear the truth and you know that it isn't easy to swallow, but you know that I will tell you. If you ask if you look fat in something, I will tell you the truth. If you think your spouse is cheating on you, I will tell you my honest opinion. Don't ask the question if you really don't want the answer. Sometimes my honesty scares people. I have a very good friend who was kind of forced into being my friend by circumstances and I think it scared her to death. However, after almost 10 years, she always says that I am not so bad as long as I am your friend, but she wouldn't want to be my enemy. I am really not that bad, well as long as I like you. There really aren't alot of people that I don't like enough that they should be scared. However, when I find someone that hits that nerve with me, NOTHING they do or say will change that. Usually I know this within minutes of meeting someone too. I think I get that from my mom. I can only think of one person that grates on my nerves at this base. That is a vast improvement over past assignments. Usually I meet at least 4 or 5, but surprisingly, not here. Maybe I am mellowing out in my old age. I know that there are some who would normally annoy me alot, but I just see them as young and misinformed now. I hope age doesn't mellow me too much. I would hate to lose that piss and vinegar personality that so many have come to love.

2 comments:

  1. Well I love you for you. Im glad I have had the pleasure of getting to know you and have you in my life. I love your refreshing honesty and that you arent afraid of who you are or of pretending to be someones friend when you really have no intent on becoming one.

    -Julie

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  2. This is probably my favorite post to date. This is you. This is the Sunshine we all know and love. Keep rocking the boat.

    -Rusty

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