Friday, June 12, 2009

Being Responsible

There is a quote by an unknown author that describes the way I feel about life. It says "If you follow the plan you made for yourself when you were twenty, then you'd become the image of success that someone much younger, less experienced and more naive would settle for." I believe this wholeheartedly. The person I wanted to become, what I wanted to do with my life is so different now than it was then. I have grown so much. I now have a much different picture of what success is and it has little to do with the mighty dollar. I know that what I am good at and what I enjoy doing is so far from what pleased me as a young girl and how unhappy I would have been if I had followed my original plan. If all that has changed, then why is it not possible that my entire being has changed? Why should I be held responsible for something I said or did to hurt or offend you when I was younger? I will completely take responsibility for all my poor actions and decisions, but I refuse to be persecuted any longer for the mishaps of my youth. If I have grown as a person, shouldn't other people have grown too? Holding grudges and bitterness in your heart does nothing more than make you miserable and age you more quickly. I find it hard to stomach that there are still those out there that would not speak to me simply because I did not play with them as a child. Isn't that insane? Or the old boyfriend who has obviously moved on with his life, maybe has a wife, possibly a couple of kids and you are still so angry because I broke up with him over 10 years ago. I admit I didn't do it gently, but doesn't it appear that he would have moved on? As I am moving further into my 30s, I realize I am just too old to hold a grudge. If I was bitchy to you or broke your heart or whatever your beef may be, if it still bothers you and you think about it more often than you should, please feel free to talk to me about. Chances are I may apologize. I am really not a bad person. Please take the time to open your heart and your mind to forgiveness as well.

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