Weight Watchers Anniversary

Today marks one year that I have been a Weight Watchers member.  One year...52 weeks...a little more than 52 pounds lost.  I am more than happy with that.  Weight loss of one pound a week is healthy and normal.  I am still around 20 lbs from my ultimate goal, but my deadline on that is my 40th birthday and that is not for another 7 months.  The pounds are coming off slower, but then again I have less to lose.  The way I see it, if I never lose another ounce, I am in better health and may live a little longer than I would have a year ago.  The good news is that I don't see it as a diet anymore.  Making healthy food choices is just a way of life.  Let me share a few "dieting" frustrations and no, it isn't about how much I missed candy on Valentine's Day.

The commissary on base is small and you see the same cashiers and baggers on every trip.  I make A LOT of trips.  I will admit that I am in there shopping at least twice a week.  That being said, I don't need to hear the commentary on my frequency or purchases.  Eating healthy means increasing your intake of fresh vegetables and fruit.  Those items aren't dry goods with lengthy shelf lives.  In fact, not much has a lengthy shelf life in my house when I have two growing boys.  The number of comments I endure not just  about  how often I shop, but also "do you know how much those cost?"  Lately, this is accompanying my large purchases of mandarin oranges.  The whole family loves them.  We go through several bags a week.  Why does the cashier care?  She isn't paying my food bill.  The produce manager who asked about my purchases in order to increase his own produce order, he made sense.  The cashier, not so much. She even had the audacity to tell me that the cans of them were cheaper.  I laughed and said I was more than able to price compare, but thank you, I prefer fresh.

Anyone who has ever tried to eat smart will understand this next one.  The people who try to force feed you or guilt you into eating junk.  It is okay if I want to pass on a slice of pizza.  I won't die if I choose a salad.  It is fine if I don't want a slice of birthday cake.  In fact, diet or no diet, if it is a typical cake with overly sweet icing, I would pass anyway.  I am not a big birthday and wedding cake eater.  Sometimes it seems people think if I am saying no that they think I am starving myself.  People have gotten very persistent about me consuming things almost like a drug dealer trying to convert another good girl to junky.  They find it hard to believe that I can say no.

My secret is not really a secret.  I am a planner.  I plan everything in my life.  Drives people insane.  I am not very spontaneous at all.  So, I plan my splurges.  I factor any meal that I can't control, like banquets and other events, into my points for the day and week.  I have had so many people want to talk to me about my weight loss and they don't always like the answers because they are looking for a quick fix.  I chose Weight Watchers because it was a solid plan.  Eat smart and exercise.  Nothing off limits, but everything in moderation.  I don't like prepackaged meals and their programs because you are bound to their meals.  I get to eat at restaurants and parties.  I don't like meal replacement shakes because they literally make me sick.  I don't think there is a magic pill so why would I take pills?  What are the other things...don't eat meat, only eat meat, no bread, no pasta, no potatoes, no sugar.....I could go on and on.  Bottom line is that they all seem great at first and if you need to drop 5lbs before a big event, then go for it, but if you are looking for lifelong weight loss and overall better health, then diet and exercise is the only way.  I am not saying you have to do Weight Watchers, but do something similar because it works.  Lastly, if one more person tells me that they would like to do WW but they can't afford it.  My online program is only about $20 a month.  How much is your life worth to you?  I think living long enough to see my children grown and actually being able to grow old is worth so much more than $20 a month.

My Reality

It's Monday and it has definitely felt like Monday all day.  The last few weeks have been insanely busy and I have hardly had the time to think.  This morning I actually got to sit down and have my coffee instead of carrying a cup around with me and hoping I could drink it before it got cold.

The thing about being busy is that I kind of let things build up.  I tend to take care of everyone but me and I really need to learn to not do that.  I am working on it though and releasing some of that is why I am writing today.

There are many things that really get my dander up, as my mama would say.  Luckily, as I have grown older I have learned how not to blow up about things and just let them ride.  However, just because I don't blow up right then does not mean that I actually handle things any better.  There are many things that just annoy me.

First and foremost, in this current economy everyone is having financial issues. That is the reality of things.  We all know it and we all respect when someone says they can't do something because of the money involved.  However, I don't understand nor do I respect when people say that or even that they can't pay their bills and then they manage to buy beer/alcohol and cigarettes or new clothes/shoes.  Wants are not needs.  If you are having problems meeting your needs then maybe you should alter your wants.

Next, social media is not a healthy way to hash things out with your husband/wife/partner.  When emotions run high, things can get nasty and it never helps to bring your 500 closest friends into the argument.  This is a good rule of thumb with all arguments, but most definitely those between you and your loved one.  No one wants to watch your fight.

Your sex life should not be discussed in public.  It is tacky!  The bedroom is kind of like Vegas; what happens there should stay there.  Unless you are discussing the lack of  sex with me as pertinent to your marital discourse because I am being a good friend and listening; however, the intimate details are not necessary for this conversation.

Lastly, I need to make myself less available.  Apparently I am always there when I am needed.  It has become expected.  However, those same people aren't there when I need them.  I can't be at their beck and call and then when things are reversed, be ignored or treated as a lesser being.  The bulk of my time should be given to those who value me as a person.  The ones who appreciate all I have to offer.  Maybe it is time I start looking at who fits into that category...

I Am Back

I just realized how very long it had been since I blogged.  It isn’t that I haven’t had anything to say.  It is more like I haven’t found the time to say it in the way I really wanted to.  I figured, what better time than election time to return to my blog and spend some time with my thoughts.

This will not be about who I think you should vote for, because I think that is a personal decision and at this point, with the election being tomorrow, there is little that I can say that will sway your opinion.  Anyone who knows me knows that politics is something I have followed since way before I was old enough to vote and turning 18 and being able to partake in the process was a big day for me.  I grew up in a household where I never really knew who my parents would vote for.  However, our kitchen table was always a mecca for discussion about the issues both economic and social.  My parents never cared if my opinions lined up with theirs as long as I could back up what I believed with facts and not simply, well my friends believe it.  We were taught to think for ourselves.  A lesson I want to convey to my children.  I always took things much more seriously than my sister.  For a long time she wasn’t registered to vote and couldn’t see where who was in office had anything to do with her.  I knew that would change over time and she is no longer so apathetic about government affairs.

I had wonderful teachers who taught me how the government ran and why it was the way it was.  Before the time of too much paperwork and teaching to the test, they had the time to teach us how to function as productive members of society.  Since those days in education are long gone, it is now up to me, as a parent to teach my children not just to understand the process, but hopefully, to convey the passion that I feel about it.  Not to say that the process isn’t flawed, so in a completely independent, non-partisan way, I am going to proceed with my rant today…

The Electoral College is an outdated concept and we cannot fear changing just because it has always been this way.  In what way can it be good that the vote of the people is not what elects our President?  This concept essentially conveys that you have the right to vote, but your vote may or may not count.  When this process was put into place, we lived in a much different country.  Our population was spread out over thousands miles of country with inadequate transportation and communication.  Like those things have changed, so should our election process.  Campaigning was impractical and frowned upon.  Our fore fathers believed that voters could be swayed by local members of the parties and even threatened into voting a certain way.  They also believed that the majority of our residents were not qualified to decide who could be President.  Most were uneducated and often illiterate.  Disseminating documents about platforms and prior voting histories was difficult.  But as I said, this is not the world we live in anymore.

We now have the ability for all citizens, even stationed abroad, to vote via the mail.  We no longer have to travel many miles to a capital city in order to vote.  Some states even offer the opportunity for people to vote early, often weeks ahead of time, just to make sure that they can do so at their own leisure.  Votes are counted electronically.  Every person is tied to a social security number which became mandatory when I was a child (probably early 80s).  So why is it that the President can’t be elected by the popular vote of the people?  Seems easy enough to me.

I see bumper stickers all the time in Idaho that say “Blue Girl in a Red State”.  I actually feel sorry for those people.  There are only a few states that don’t practice the winner take all concept of the electoral votes and Idaho isn’t one of them.  So, essentially, each of those people go to the polls every four years knowing that no matter how much they believe in their candidate or how much passion they have, their vote essentially doesn’t count.  Even if a candidate wins the popular vote of a state by a small margin, by winner takes all rules, they receive all the votes from that college.  How ridiculous is that?  It makes me wonder why some people are still voting.  Not exactly the most encouraging thing to teach your child.  Before I learned about the Electoral College (probably thanks to Coach Morlino), I actually believed that every vote counted.  I thought that one vote could change the world.  I really want my children to believe that their vote is that important.  I want them to know that whoever is elected to President is there because that is what the majority of the people want. 

Maybe it would take a constitutional amendment to change it, but shouldn’t democracy be worth the trouble?  After all, our fore fathers didn’t believe that women or African-Americans had the intellect to vote for our President either and that was changed.  Just because it has always been this way doesn’t make it right or the best way.  Isn’t that why every 4 years we get to decide if we want to make a change or not?

Stepping down now…

Observation

It has been awhile since I posted anything. Life has been kind of crazy and busy. Truth is, I haven't felt much like myself in a long time and I am just starting to get back in the swing of things. I have been in recovery from surgery for more than a month and during this time, social media has been my only real "connection" with the outside world. It is amazing how much you can learn without ever leaving your home. Some people are blaming Facebook for all the evils in their lives and you know, like always, I have an opinion on this. If a "friend" is posting comments that you find unforgivable or that make you think, "why are we friends?", then you simply need to delete them. I mean, if every word they utter makes your skin crawl and you fundamentally disagree with all their life choices, then it is time for you to edit them right out of your life. I am not personally someone who does this because the thing I love most about my friends is that they are so varied in their thoughts and beliefs that they truly enrich me as person. The difference in real friends and Facebook friends is that most people censor their feelings about things in order to not offend their true friends, but on Facebook, you tend to post something that is a dead giveaway to who you are as a person. It could be a shared video or a comment about politics or social issues. People say things on Facebook that they would never dream of saying to you, just because they try desperately to avoid face-to-face conflict. Secondly, Facebook did not ruin your marriage. If your spouse was not happy and found someone in "Facebookland" that they connected with, chances are it would have happened regardless. People were having affairs before the internet was ever invented. In fact, before Facebook, your spouse was connecting with someone at a local bar, live and in person. And, for the record, just because you put on your status that life is perfect and you are so in love, it doesn't make it so. If you aren't happy and you are living in a loveless marriage, Facebook statuses won't help that. You may think that you are faking it for the world, but trust me, there is always someone out there who knows the truth. It would be so much better for you to just say nothing. In fact, I believe in freedom of speech, but I also believe in having some dignity and that means, don't put everything out there for the world. There is a such thing as too much information. I don't want to read your constant bitching and complaining anymore than I want to read your sappy, fake crap. I may be about to do a little purging of my "friends" right now. Like I said, I like my friends to enrich me. I suppose if you make the cut, I must find something enriching about our relationship.

It's My Birthday

Today is my birthday and I am 36 years old. It isn't really one of those monumental ages. There are no special cards or balloons with a big 36 on them to mark the occasion. I don't personally find that I am especially "old", but I suppose in accordance with the average age of most military spouses that I am in regular contact with I am probably considered way past middle aged. So, for the record and to clarify some private comments I have been sent, yes, I know how much closer I am to 40. Also a point of record, I am not really concerned with growing older. I embrace every year that I inch closer to 40, just as I did getting closer to 30. I am simply a person who embraces my age and welcomes the new experiences with open arms. Each year is an opportunity to learn and grow more. I am easily 10 times better of a woman than I was at eighteen. There is a reason that they say older and wiser. I always heard about people fearing age, but times have changed. We no longer have a life span of 60 years and today, I probably barely reached middle age. I have so much life left in me. I always talk about my time at the W and how much those years meant to me and how much I learned. Learning to love and appreciate the "aging" me is just one more experience I gained. During my time at the W, I met so many fabulous alums and I had the pleasure of being around women who were in there 70s, 80s and even 90s who still had a real zest for life. Women who didn't decide at some arbitrary age that it was time to just sit around and wait to die. So as every year passes, my goal for the new year is just to live life to its fullest. To be true to myself and not some idea of what I should be. I hope to be a woman that some of the younger military spouses hope to emulate as I did with those before me and to someday be that wonderful older alum that inspires a young W girl. Now, if I could just manage to find my 18 year old body again...

Lost in Another World

I have been pretty much a bum the last few days. I can admit it. It was for the greater good though. After purchasing several books on my Kindle for the last few months and intending on reading them, I decided to finally get around to reading. I am not one of those people who can just read a chapter here and there. If the book is worth reading, I get so involved in the characters and plot that I almost refuse to put it down. I have always said that the world I enter in books is so much more interesting than anything I live daily. Now, if I could only get my kids to see reading the way I do. How do you really get someone to love reading? I know plenty of people who refuse to read because they know the movie is coming out soon and they will just watch that. I don't know if I have ever left a movie saying "that was SO much better than the book". If I am wrong, feel free to correct me. It isn't often that I get the chance to see new movies anymore. Our town has a small, two-screen theater. If the movie isn't one of the "big" releases or a kid-friendly flick, then we don't even get it. Sure, I can go to Boise, but I have to really want to see the movie. A movie in Boise would include the hiring of a sitter since it wouldn't be a family movie and then driving an hour just to sit in a theater and come home because you have to relieve the sitter. Most movies aren't worth it. In the meantime, I will continue to get lost in the books as long as my family can handle the occasional bumming days with my nose buried into my Kindle. If I am lucky, some of it will rub off on my kids.

Kennels of Irritation

I once posted on my Facebook that I don't have pet peeves, I have entire kennels of irritation. Lots of people found it amusing, but I don't think they realize exactly how true that statement is. Something is guaranteed to irritate me each day. Sometimes big; sometimes small. Yesterday, it was the checkout counter at the Commissary. I had been there earlier to buy my groceries. I thought I had a pretty complete list, but I got home and realized there was one thing I had forgotten. No big deal. I will just run up and grab it before they close, which is at 5pm and that is a whole different irritation. Anyway, I go right to the item, grab it and head to the checkout. Since they have put in self-checkouts, there is no Express Lane. So I waited behind the people with at least 50 items to check themselves out. It never fails that there is some idiot who apparently can't read or who moves as slow as Christmas who is in that line. If you aren't capable of operating the machine, then you need to go through the checkout counter where there are people who are paid to do that for you. Don't make people with a couple of items stand in line waiting for you to figure out that tomato is spelled with a T. Ignorance in general irritates me. Daily I read people's posts on Facebook and I automatically start correcting grammar. It is really annoying when someone has a strong opinion about something and they are making a really good point, but its impact is lessened by horrible spelling and grammar. With school starting back, the people who are choosing to home school their kids never fails to fascinate me. I respect the majority of those who feel strongly and are more than capable of teaching their children; however, there never fails to be those people who can barely put two sentences together and surely were not scholars even in their time, but they truly believe that they can do a better job of teaching their children than those who are professionally trained to do so. I can't wait to see how that turns out. Guess that will be all for the day. I could go on about ignorant people forever and I wouldn't want to bore anyone.